Time for Heroes

2008-07-12T21:44:00.000+08:00

MOVED.
http://prosaist-kid.livejournal.com

2008-07-05T21:36:00.002+08:00

College Day was helluva good fun. The muffins were seriously, honestly really good. Especially the chocolate ones. And I bet Vannesa voted for the eventual Saints Idol winner. She definitely did. I'm sure Deborah would have done the same if she was there! Aiye!

2008-06-28T21:40:00.003+08:00

Sleepover with the J1 soccer peeps was the freaking fun-est thing that happened in over 2 weeks! It was super hilarious; from the Xbox sessions to disturbing Kevin to laughing at stupidity. It's definitely something unforgettable. Especially that sharing session we had before we went to sleep at five in the morning. Hahaha. Oh my gosh. If only we could spend everyday away from our differences like these. If only. I still love you guys though; lets just hope it doesn't change - ever. Now that common test is over (which I have to say was decent), June Holidays have finally begun! Albeit for a few days because there's A'Level Malay Oral next Tuesday! ZOMG.

2008-06-22T15:07:00.003+08:00

I haven't been myself lately; or more like the whole month. It's like I've evolved into something meaner, something I detest, something I've sworn I would never be at the start of the year. Sometimes, I wake up in the morning with the most evil of evil intentions. I need to moult off all these nonsense. And now that the holidays are almost over, I think it's about time that I get a grip on myself.

1. God
2. Family, friends
3. Academics
4. SAJC Soccer

In that order.

2008-06-21T21:58:00.004+08:00

Maybe getting out of this is a good thing; my dream all along, has soured. It wasn't as beautiful as I thought it would be - such a misfit.

2008-06-21T15:40:00.001+08:00

Welcome to the fallout,
Welcome to resistance.
The tension is here,
The tension is here.
Between who you are and who you could be.
Between how it is and how it should be.

2008-06-17T12:38:00.002+08:00

Click Here to Take Survey!
Help me do this survey for my PW Group please! Thank you!

2008-06-17T09:21:00.004+08:00

"Emotions surpassed technique, determination wiped away the pain of injuries." - Soccernet.com

2008-06-15T22:59:00.002+08:00

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!
One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt, pillars of sand.

2008-06-15T05:11:00.001+08:00

2008-06-15T03:53:00.001+08:00

You'll always be a part of me,
I'm part of you indefinitely.
Girl don't you know you can't escape me,
Oh darling cause you'll always be my baby.

2008-06-12T21:23:00.004+08:00

2008-06-11T02:47:00.007+08:00

Hello y'all. Back from Manchester and feeling freaking awesome and revitalised. A super nice city (& country, UK was kick-ass!) with great people and superb weather. I've not got much to say cause it's just as it is; splendid. Managed to live out a little dream of mine by visiting Old Trafford! I'd say it was a short but enriching experience, visiting Windsor castle and that tiny bit of Beatles history at Liverpool. Just keeps me wondering how it would have been like if I was born in the other side of the world.

No man is bigger than the club, remember that Ron!

Windsor castle!

Streets of Manchester!

City of Manchester!

Told you I was happy! Spastic smile!

Alright, these are all the pictures I'm putting up from the trip; little yes, but sufficient. Now the night beckons, but my body is still 7 hours behind. Good day to you Singapore.

2008-06-03T20:50:00.002+08:00

I need a break from everyone and everything. Till the week is old, I shall see you then.

2008-05-31T10:05:00.002+08:00

Good morning, and hello there. I do realise it's been a long time since I've updated on the on-goings in life. It's also been awhile now since the sports season has ended. Still very much in that "not-wanting-to-do-anything-except-nothing" mood. Holidays were never like this. For the past 10 years of my education life, the June and December Holidays were the months to look forward to (except maybe last year). I'm affirmative that many in the first year of various junior colleges would agree this year is totally the opposite. Having to study for Common Test right at the end of the holidays is really a nightmare. You can't actually fully enjoy yourself without feeling guilty.

Just so that my classmates who are reading this know, I have not actually started on anything concrete yet. And I think it's pretty bad news for me cause I had to miss quite a lot of lessons during the last two weeks of the semester. Now, I'm heading over to Manchester for a week for a family vacation! Lucky, I say. Though I have to admit this vacation would just be another excuse for me to put studying back a further week. I don't feel like doing anything there, like I don't think I'm going to bring any study materials over. Life is pretty ain't it? Thankfully I won't be missing any lessons at all during my absence from Singapore. That would actually have been a shot in the foot.

My life is comparable to a junkie. Honestly. With that being said, I'm going to head out to celebrate someone's birthday. I'll post another post before I leave the Lion City. Don't you worry about it, and now. Good day and good week ahead.

2008-05-24T21:55:00.001+08:00

2008-05-19T22:12:00.004+08:00

So I'm a little left of centre,
I'm a little out of tune.
Some say I'm paranormal,
So I just bend their spoon.
Who wants to be ordinary,
In a crazy, mixed-up world?

2008-05-19T08:40:00.001+08:00

Everybody's looking for that something,
One thing that makes it all complete.
You'll find it in the strangest places,
Places you never knew it could be.

2008-05-17T18:10:00.007+08:00

Today was a landmark for me, in terms of realising my potential. Attending the ASEAN Forum was very..unexpected, in a good way. To be honest, I don't really want to know about ASEAN. However, the forum was very inspiring for brief periods of moment. I've always had this desire to help others ever since attending that YMCA camp back in secondary three. And, I've always wanted to go back for another, but another never did come. Anyhow, I wasn't really sure how this forum would pan out. Fortunately, it was pretty cool. I'm sincerely grateful for today and I can only feel excited for what's to come in life.

No longer is maturity an excuse for my wrongdoings. Before soon, end of year will approach and I'll be turning 17. Now, that kinds of frighten me. It's like looking at a picture of yourself in primary school; wow, I've really grown up. Only yesterday was I struggling to reach for the cookies on the last shelf; hoping for time to fly by so that I'd be an independent adult, able to do things on my own. Days turned to months, and years came by. Now here I am, down the road, still the exact same person, but with a whole new perspective/outlook on life. That's why maturity is tangible. Only you can feel it within you. There's no point in rushing it; it comes naturally when your mind is ready for things greater than you are. Today, I'm so inspired, I feel like flying without wings.

2008-05-12T22:31:00.006+08:00

Before I go to bed, I just have to get this off me. Today, I was filled with regret. My aunt whom I'm very close to passed away of cancer in the morning; and if that's not enough to make me sad, I had put back visiting her in the hospital for a few weeks already. I just kept giving the excuse that I was too busy with work and had no time. On top of this, I did not visit her for Hari Raya for the past 2 years. Someone who has taken care of me since I was young and all through troubled times; I am so ashamed of myself. At the present moment, I'm just blank.

I'm really sorry. I hope you're in a better place now. I tried to numb the guilt but I find it stupid, cause I am really to blame for the disappointment. I love you a lot, and for that, I'm really sorry.

2008-05-11T19:20:00.004+08:00

I didn't really appreciate the location of my house till today. Till I found out the far-reaching buses that stops at the bus-stop near my place. Like hell, I didn't know 133 goes all the way to National Library at Bugis! I've only taken that bus to school; and usually complaining cause it takes years to arrive. My goodness.

Anyway, I've joined Bloggers Club! Freaking awesome shizz I tell you. We get the opportunity to write up on all kinds of stuff in school and I can't wait to get started. It's like the baby steps to my goal of one day being a full-fledged journalist and then of course the President of this country just like Yusoff Ishak! Technically, I'm the sports correspondent. That means I'm going to have to write up on the rugby finals tomorrow! And oh, I joined this 'Writer's Ink' competition in school. It's like this overnight writing competition; it's getting me excited!

Now now, I just can't get over the fact of how proud I am to be a Saint. Being in the Gabrielite family was freaking cool, but seriously, I've never experienced such school spirit. Those kind of things in life whereby you're proud to say, "I was part of that!"

"Fortune favours the brave, for words can never be said like this."

2008-05-05T19:30:00.002+08:00

Once a Saint,
Always a Saint.

Lets go Team SAJC! The very last stretch, fight for the school; fight for the crest that's in your heart. Now, what are they gonna do When the Saints Go Marching In.

2008-05-04T22:01:00.001+08:00

2008-05-04T21:56:00.003+08:00

There were so many promises at the gates of our secondary schools. Now, half a year on, how many of them have been carried out?

2008-05-04T21:53:00.004+08:00

It's drawing to a close. I'm really going to miss you people. The past few months have been real great. The battles that we fought on the field, the laughters and tears that we shared off them. Now, lets finish what we set out to do: bring back the Holy Grail.

2008-05-04T21:35:00.007+08:00

"Why do you try so hard to fit in, when you were born to stand out?"

I love my life.
Every single part of it.

I have weird relationships with my friend's friends. Like I know them through certain friends, no formal introduction or anything of that sort. Just talk you know. And then we part. The next time I see them around, I feel awkward. Cause I don't know whether to just say "Hi" (which might appear to be a little too friendly since I don't exactly know them) or just to smile and walk-by; or just ignore. Typical example of a day in school. Oh well, the night is getting old,

Goodnight and have fun in school.

2008-04-30T22:06:00.002+08:00

2008-04-27T16:17:00.001+08:00

"For as bad-ass and unaffected as we try to come off, we're all just one sentence away from being brought to the edge of tears, if only it was worded right. And I don't want to act immune to that any more. I took the biggest detour from myself over the past year, since I decided that I wasn't going to care about what people thought about me. I got to the point where I had so much padding on that, sure, I couldn't feel the negativity, but that's because I couldn't feel much of anything. And I think I'm done with that." - John Mayer

2008-04-13T00:53:00.006+08:00

"Whether you think you can or cannot, you're right."

Belief. Being the single quintessential reason why people succeed or flop in life.

This past week has been really challenging. There have been moments where I just question the validity of my reasonings for persevering. In such instances, I'd consider myself to be lucky, having great people around who keep my resolve deeply intact and rooted.

There was the single damning question of friendships. What with that whole new world evolving in school, life ain't no clockwork, that we could turn back to those silly times in secondary school. We seek for greater autonomy yet there are those gossip hounds out there that just won't leave you alone.

I guess that's why I have an affinity with the disabled. They seem to understand that everyone around them is special, that everyday is a gift. Isn't it a pity that we, in our youth, forget all these. Why can't society just mature? To settle for less, to be in control of their wealth.

For now, I'm just happy to be alive and kicking. I know God is preparing me for a huge battle. All these adversities that have headed my way are nothing. Please, don't sympathise with my plight. I'm not unfortunate at all, quite frankly, the opposite. Let ugly rear its uglier side, I'm ready for more.

2008-04-06T22:29:00.002+08:00

I'm gonna fight them off, those inner demons.
They're never getting near my thoughts,
EVER AGAIN.

2008-04-04T20:36:00.007+08:00

"If you want to be happy, be." - Leo Tolstoy

I want clarity in this confusion.
From today, I shall retire my-self to be an allusion.

Oh no, I shall not live in the mercy of those around me.
No, they must have confused me with some other me.
Let me rebuild your misconceptions,
Yesterday is history, yesterday is memory.

Time may after all not be the common enemy,
Have we lost the value of sincerity?
Every second we're thread lengths away,
You'll turn just to scream your world far far away.

When no one understands,
I'll believe you.
Let me share your sunshines,
Let me help relieve the gloom of your murky brines.

-

Every day is just another day,
Don't let their words carve images of me today.

2008-03-31T20:46:00.006+08:00

First my wallet, now my shoe bag (which obviously contains my new boots). What the smack is going on? Why have I been so careless?! These past two days have been a real nightmare. Nothing can be quite compared to this.

I'm fighting to survive in a sand pit; inevitably I'll just get sucked in. Every time I see the end, the start of a new beginning, I fall straight back in. When will I learn that no one event is going to change my luck. It's like I'm constantly waiting for something to happen to me that'll turn my life around.

I'm forever struggling with this need to be myself while at the same time, be my age. Tell me, how can I be child-like while at the same time be matured in thinking.

Now you're just a memory;
stay away from me Sunday,
stay away from me Monday.

2008-03-31T00:58:00.006+08:00

"The opposite of love isn't hate - it's indifference. If you hate me, that means you still care." Marcia Cross on Desperate Housewives.

Yesterday should have been non-existent. I was suppose to go looking for my Othello guide book when I freaking lost my wallet on the bus! ARGH! Nightmare man. Ended up having to walk back home, in the rain. Such an appropriate setting for a stupid day.

And that means I've gotta get around with my sister's E-Z link card. I hope.

Anyway, I've been reading quite a bit lately, and I didn't know how much I didn't know. Like I didn't know Forrest Gump was actually a movie. Or that the character said, "Life is like a box of chocholates." Which was what the scholar said during her speech on Friday. Hmm, interesting person ain't she. I hope she learns how to speak just a little softer when she's on the microphone, geez.

Nor did I know that Madonna actually collaborated with Justin Timberlake on her new album. Or the fact that Fall Out Boy and John Mayer covered "Beat It" (sounds atrocious for your information). Alright, maybe the latter two won't be of much help in your GP essays. How about that singing toilet in Japan? Uh-huh. Bet that caught you off-guard.

I've been trying to wrap my Othello text for the past half hour and to be honest, I don't actually know where to begin. The cover is just damn nice, I don't feel like touching it.

I've gotta run, to bed.
Goodnight!

2008-03-24T21:12:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow, we battle!
(When the Saints go marching in...)

2008-03-24T17:38:00.009+08:00

Dear God,

I pray that you would look after all of my friends and protect them. I pray that you'll keep them happy at all times and that the sadness that some are experiencing now would soon be lifted. It hurts to see some of them not be enthusiastic about their time in Junior College.

Be it the challenges they face with their new classmates or coping with the workload, I pray that you would give them strength, courage and patience to deal with them. Though I've not be all too optimistic about life these past few weeks, you have always comforted me whenever I close that door on myself. I pray that you would also give me wisdom in comforting them and on my part, I shall do more to brighten their lives.

Oh God,

I also pray for those I've consciously/unconsciously offended these past three months. I thoroughly acknowledge the fact that I'm far from perfect but some of the things I've done, some of the things I've said, could have been refined or better yet, avoided. I pray that you would ease the tension in their lives and reduce the burden that they're facing.

Oh God,

I also pray that you would look after my teammates as we begin our tournament. I pray that you would protect them from any harm and injuries and that no matter the outcome, we would forever treasure our friendships.

I love you people.

2008-03-23T22:05:00.001+08:00

2008-03-14T21:33:00.009+08:00

Hello y'all. The March holidays has been really interesting. I'd thought it would turn out to be one of those whereby you just get glued to your bed. Turn out to be quite the opposite, I was just yearning to be back on my bed!

Anyhow, it started with the soccer trip to Kuala Lumpur on Friday right after school. The bus trip wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. There was chapel followed by sing-along sessions and of course PSP! HAHA! 6 hours to and fro! As a whole, the trip was pretty alright I guess, just that I didn't get play time. AAAAH. I really need my fitness back! More runs on the track next week! I desperately want to play during the season which is like in two weeks time. (When the Saints go marching in...)

Paolo's birthday surprise at CJC was the bomb! The expression when he saw me was priceless. HAHA. I'm just really happy he enjoyed the entire day. My best buddy, 17th birthday. Amazing. After which there was the 08A07 (2nd intake) chalet! Which was quite weird, cause we haven't really had time to bond previously. Now that I've discovered some of the cheeky stuff they've been up to, HEHE. Then there was 4E6 reunion barbecue at ECP. The weather was horrendous, the place was utterly wet and disgusting. BUT, my ex-classmates are the best-est people. Catching up with them can be considered orgasmic! Like Muse! Anyway, seeing everyone so happy together warms my insides like a good apple pie! Unfortunately I had to miss 08A07's (1st intake) outing on Friday. Boo.

All of this gatherings/outings that took place had to of course revolve around my trainings which was a resident event during the week. No complains though, just that these trainings are draining me. I want to rediscover the exact same passion and love I had for soccer when I was in primary school. Those were the days I made my parents send me to school 3 hours (!) before the start of lessons to play soccer!

Now, here I am, on a Sunday night, mentally exhausted from studying since yesterday (which happened to be the first time during the holidays that I was free.) And I think I lost the John Sloman book I borrowed from the MRL. Damn, that book costs over 50 bucks.

Now that's what I call SPIRIT. 4E6, 07!

Saints never hang up their halos! (ALIENS KIDNAPPING ME!)

'God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light.'

2008-03-10T20:25:00.002+08:00

I'm proud to say I've finally solved Rubik's! HAHA.

2008-03-04T22:28:00.001+08:00

2008-03-02T21:40:00.009+08:00

I shan't hang around no more.
I realise what a fool I've been;
to meddle with things way beyond my maturity.
My life is a mess, just like the condition of my bedroom.

2008-03-01T21:42:00.003+08:00

2008-02-29T20:21:00.007+08:00

I desperately need to learn to forgive. I believe it's my inability to accept differences that causes me to be vengeful. Okay, so it's easy to acknowledge. Now, what can I do about it? Well, I think God answered that in the morning.

Everyday I wake up wishing the day to be better than the previous. I rigidly follow my morning rituals for fear of it being a bad day. All dressed up, I set off early for school. Music and wishful thinking accompanies me on my journey. Then temptation comes along. As I step into the village, he envelopes me. He wrestles with my conscience. He teases me, he commands me. And as the day progresses, he slowly wears me out till I find no reason to resist.

I wonder when this saga will end. Or maybe it'll continue on just like those Survivor installments. On it goes, till one day, everyone just gets tired and switch off.

Asyraf,
Do you have heart?
Do you have the courage to forgive?
Most importantly, do you really want a new tomorrow?

2008-02-23T23:06:00.006+08:00

Team 2009.

Team SAJC.

Today's training session was damn fun. No, I'm still a crippled lame ass. But, since there were quite a few injured, what we did was to take out the fire hose to water the field. Of course we did just that! And more. Lets just say I went home totally drenched.

I wonder how my Civics Group for the second intake is going to turn out. And I wonder why people in better JCs would want to appeal back to SAJC. It's really weird, but ah well, to each his own. Oh, and after hearing how the Principal handles the appeal cases, I have got to say she's pretty impressive. Especially regarding the contracts. At first it seemed like blackmail, HAHAHA. But, not a bad idea after all. Makes them feel guilty if they don't uphold those terms.

Anyway, heads up to Singapore for winning the bid. Damn awesome, I can imagine myself two years from now..guarding one of the venues for the Youth Olympics as part of my National Service. Hahaha. What the hell, so exciting.

Now it's time for a bath, good night.

2008-02-22T23:54:00.010+08:00

Baby it's a new age, you're like my new craze. - 50 Cent

Hello.

I'm quite happy with the second orientation. Though it's fairly similar to the first, my orientation group is super awesome. OG DSA. Hahaha, okay well. We made that up. And the first thing we did was to get caught skipping subject combination talk. What an inspiration. AAAAH.

I'm now officially a Saint. Damn happy man. I think my parents have barely seen me in the uniform. I've been going out like six thirty in the morning and returning at ten plus the whole week. I should be a more filial son. Yes I will.

Now now, I'm really hoping we get ACJC for the first game of A Division. Please. I can't stand the way they were behaving during the rugby game. They need be taught a lesson. No, they must be taught a lesson.

And I realise that this post is very self-centred. A lot of I's. I shall stop.
Or I will sound like that pot-calling-the-kettle-black girl.
Good night I.

2008-02-17T00:13:00.006+08:00

Hello strangers,

I thought new friends meant new beginnings. I thought wrong. Different people; same old storyline. I guess this is what it means to have loads of ha-ha friends and none in sadness. It seems that everything I touch gets messed up.

The thing I hate about co-ed school is that everyone is trying to impress (it ain't funny no more!). No one wants to take a back seat. I promise not to get sucked into this. If I am the only one in the back seat, then so be it. I shall not mask my emotions.

I shall follow the leaders in every right turn, and leave them at every wrong one.

Good day and good night.

2008-02-12T20:51:00.000+08:00

Selfish people. Always thinking about having fun. Sit tight and be all pretty. I'm really starting to detest you lot. How many of you actually realise that one of us is being left out? Ass-wipe.

2008-02-08T11:39:00.000+08:00

"I think I have a sleeping problem. Dope."

I have to say my neighbours are good and considerate people. They don't seem to want to stay at home for Chinese New Year. Well, for the first day at least. But then again, it's the most boring-est holiday. Everything is closed.

I feel like cutting my hair;
I feel like buying my uniform;
I feel like buying my Onitsuka's.

2008-02-07T09:57:00.000+08:00

I can't wait to get back in action.
One more month!
AAAAH!

2008-02-06T16:26:00.000+08:00

Now I believe in miracles.
Thanks for healing me.
Thank you God.

2008-02-02T15:47:00.001+08:00

2008-01-31T20:25:00.000+08:00

Please God, I want to play for my school, badly.
Please heal me.
Please.

2008-01-29T22:52:00.000+08:00

It doesn't matter if you're blue, brown, yellow, orange, pink, red; all that matters now is that we're all SAINTS.

Once a Saint,
Always a Saint.

2008-01-26T23:29:00.000+08:00

Thank you God.
Thank you everyone.

2008-01-20T16:25:00.001+08:00

2008-01-19T18:03:00.000+08:00

We're all ONE big happy family!

HELLO Y'ALL! I can't wait for next week!!

The sucky first week of lessons has been followed by a more exciting second. Life in Junior College is really looking up, it's going to be just as fun as secondary school (I hope!). Damn funny also, everyday we keep gossiping about CERTAIN people. One thing I like about being in a new school is this free-for-all kind of atmosphere. Everyone's trying to find new friends they can identify with. Being no different than any society, cliques are immediate. Anyhow, we've created a new culture (TRACY CLAP AND SLUT MODE, HAHAHA) and now I'm just savouring every moment of it!

Besides all the laughter and vigorous gossiping, there's always the lesson learnt! I've gotten to know a classmate that has challenged the very views I've so vehemently stood by over the course of last year. I don't know if it's God softening my insides, or maybe it's just her personality that is making me have second thoughts. 08A07! Awesome!

Now, impress me by not impressing.

Yesterday, Naz and me were like walking out to the MRT station when we decided to pop by 7 Eleven. As we were looking at the magazine covers, Naz pointed out the cover girl on Women's Weekly and went, "Don't you think she's cute?" Out of the blue, some totally random guy paying at the counter turned around and said, "Your school got a lot of those kind of girls." For a moment, we just glared at him. Seriously, how do you react to such a comment? We just gave the polite smile of acknowledging the comment before zooming out. Oh control it, you testosterone animal.

Alright, this is dope. I better get going. Goodnight, good luck!

It's beyond me, I cannot carry the weight of the heavy world.

2008-01-13T10:01:00.000+08:00

Hello! It's been awhile since I actually occupied this space. Since the end of 2007 to be exact.

Introduction to 2008:

Orientation has been awesome. New friends and all, it's getting pretty interesting. The fact that I didn't really have time to post for the duration of orientation says it all. Now the thing is, life after orientation is pretty much in repeat. School - training - home. Technically, home is like a hotel.

"What kind of room does not have a window? A mush-room!"

Anyhow, I was watching "Mandy & Her Mighty Adventures" on KC. What's Sunday morning without cartoon right?! It's pretty damn cool. And funny too. Mandy's motto is seriously hilarious. It goes along the lines, "I am Mandy and I'm the best therefore I can do it." She's damn proud about her abilities to sell products from her parent's shop. She then takes up a bet with her brother that she could sell three bags of tissue packets within the week. In the process, she lets her competitive side get the better of the humanitarian part of her. Such a simple plot yet so educational.

Alright, tracking back to school. It's pretty weird being in a co-ed school. You can't CHANGE IN THE CAFETERIA. And then there's also the thing about opposite sex being in close proximity. Really, keep those testosterones in check boys.

I've gotta tell you, when you're in such an environment everyday, it's hard not to want to be doing the "in-thing." It's just really hard. Okay anyway I've gotta go off now. Manlady showed me something extremely interesting yesterday. It really blew my mind. I for one, was totally unaware that our world was so corrupted. Nor did I know that mankind was so advanced technologically!

2008-01-12T17:34:00.000+08:00

It's love, it's love, that holds us.

2007-12-30T09:08:00.000+08:00

I miss you guys. All that fun and laughter as well as the disappointments we've shared over the years. Do you guys still remember those times in class we listened to Red Hot Chili Peppers and really rocked it out? Or maybe those outings to the jamming studio trying to record Queen's Friends Will Be Friends, getting mad at Clifford cause he kept saying it was ready when it wasn't! Hahaha. Oh, and remember racing down to recess right after Ms Toh's lesson to be first in queue?! Damn, why couldn't we have been together, longer.

How I wish we could all go back in time and do all that again. I seriously wouldn't mind going through a triple English period everyday(!) just so I can be in the same room as you folks. I'll be the first to admit that this year wasn't as rosy as the last. There were times when it seemed all doom and gloom, especially during the making of the class video. But I guess it made us stronger didn't it? We pulled through that and now we can safely say our friendships have stood the test of time.

Aaron: Hey! Gym buddy! Hahaha. It's been really awesome getting to know you. You're always on hand with your optimism and humour to cheer me up. Remember during the examination period when I started spreading around this dumb rumour about John Mayer being gay? Your expression when you heard it was priceless! Thanks a million bud for everything.

Aloysius: Hello the guy that seats 2 places behind me! I will forever treasure our friendship. Though we've not really seen each other much this holidays, I feel deeply honoured to have you beside me in the jamming studio! Hahaha.

Calvin: Whatsup Wye! I am really glad we got to know each other much better this year with you sitting behind me and all. You're like the most awesomest person to talk to in class especially during mundane lessons. Don't forget to vote for me when I run for office okay! And keep me updated with your concert dates man! Your voice so like mine lor, very nice and sweet.

Clifford: Yo Clifford! 4 years man! I can't believe you tolerated me for 4 years! Though I've always disturbed you, you're always forgiving and you never ever took my remarks personally. I am deeply appreciative of all the "shit" you've done for me. You're the kind of friend who I can always count on no matter the situation. Thanks Clifford, thanks for everything.

Haresh: Waaaaaadup dei! We go back even further in time. Since Primary One!! Awesome man. This is friendship at its pinnacle. You've always got my back and though we've drifted at times, you are always someone I can count on. Remember those chats we had on the eve of our papers? Like the night before History O'level paper! We stayed up till 3am to exchange answers and calm each other! To another decade of friendship.

LJR: Yo J-rong. We've grown so close together I swear if we were to be conjoined at the hips, we would never ever fight. Hahaha. All those times you helped me with my school work and that one particular super long chat on the phone regarding our futures was, wow. It's just, wow. I've come to appreciate the fact that for a friend, you'll do anything. Anything. You know when the wrong version of the class video was played in the hall, my heart was silently crying for you. All the effort we had put in, especially you, yes, especially you, came to nothing. But then I thought again, so what if they played the wrong video? The time spent making the video was the best and most enriching ever. It taught me a whole lot of stuff about you as a person. Thanks for everything man, thanks.

Marcus: Saysaysay YAFOOOO! Lollipop buddy! Hahaha, that was the funnest thing I did for the whole month, that Mika song. Remember that time we went for the gig and we were pushing people into the mosh pit and then started laughing till we couldn't take it? Hahaha. Oh my gosh, every single time I think of Marcus Lye, I think of those super great and funny moments we shared. Oh, and also the singing in class. I'll see you soon then! Jamming after New Year!!

Paolo: Hello hello hello Maldini! Best pal like ever. Ever. We've shared some nervy moments at the start of the year what with us being in different classes. I was quite scared at one point when we virtually didn't contact each other outside of Literature class. I was afraid we would lose the great friendship we had the previous year. All those times we hung out after school playing soccer or even going to R.K together with Terence. Oh man, I'll definitely miss going out with you that often. You've shared with me things from the inner most part of your soul and you've guided me when everything just seems to be closing on me. You showed me the path to God, and you've changed me for the better. How can I not be thankful for that? I am eternally grateful and forever in your debt.

Terence: Hey yo Xhit. What can I say? Known you since our days of being CS-ers in primary school. Another chapter in our lives done. I already miss seeing your smile (wah, sounds damn gay.) You've always shared with me about almost anything. We've also had some nervy moments but our friendship has also stood the test of time. I guess that says more than anything. Thanks Terence!

2007 has been a very very eventful year, I'm pretty happy, as well as sad, to say goodbye to this year. It means the end of certain things. For those whom I have not mentioned above, such as Russell, Joshua Isaac, Giridhar, Patrick, you guys play an equally big role in my life. Thanks so much to everyone who have helped me become who I am today.

Since it's going to be the New Year soon, I've got something I need to do. I need to ask for forgiveness, especially from this someone. Ee Thai.

Hey, I'm sorry I've said all those stuff about you. It's not that I didn't want to apologise earlier, it's just that my ego was too big for me at times. This is the best I could do, posting an apology online. I couldn't go up to you to just say this one word, "Sorry." I know it may not suffice after all the bad blood that has been going on between us for roughly 4 months? I deeply regret not getting to know you better. Through this ordeal, you've indirectly made me a stronger person. You taught me patience above all. I've passed hurtful comments about you yet never have you once replied back in anger or tried to initiate a fight. You're really a gentleman in that sense. I hope you're reading this because I really want to start afresh. It's okay if you can't stomach this because really, I treated you like vermin. I know it myself. I just wanna say it again, I'm sorry.

Goodbye 2007. Goodbye St. Gabriel's.

Hello 2008. Hello Saints.

2007-12-25T19:33:00.000+08:00

Dear World,

I've got something to share. Well, sort of a confession. It's a guilt that has burdened me the past week. I just came back from a two-part vacation. It was a particular country that was not as financially or politically sound as Singapore. And that's why I shouldn't have referred to it as a vacation in the first place. More of like a self-discovery journey. I realise that I can never enjoy myself in a place where there is a hint of hardship.

So, what's the guilt? That I didn't do a single thing, zilch, to brighten a person's day. Nothing what so ever, not even a random act of kindness. What's the point of being exposed to such extreme conditions and not do a thing? Now here is where I am confused. What's the point of feeling sympathetic when those people don't complain about their lives at all?

Maybe it's because I've never ventured out much to see such sufferings to understand it.

Or maybe I just didn't want to look.

I remember a teacher in Primary School who said the prayers daily, after recess to thank God for the wonderful food and blessing he has bestowed on us. He said we'll never fully understand God's actions. It's because, our mind is like a cup. And trying to understand God's doings is like trying to put the entire ocean into this cup.

As I reach this milestone in life, I seek guidance. That's all.

Maybe my purpose is to bring joy to the world, one random act of kindness at a time. Or maybe, my purpose could be to fight for the equality of human beings. Maybe, maybe.

I'm just so glad that I've made new great friends which I'll elaborate in my next post. And I'm really really thankful that God has presented me with the best family ever. It doesn't matter what other people get for their birthday. My parent's love beats them all. It sure beats out having the latest gadget or fashion accessory. Those are just for the moment, mine is for all of eternity. Just like God's love.

Joy to the world people. Have a blessed day, may God grant us all wisdom.

2007-12-11T21:39:00.000+08:00

You guessed it, I regretted going for training. Interval running was mad, mad, mad. Thank God I survived! Woohoo! Christmas baby!

2007-12-11T10:34:00.001+08:00

I had a dream yesterday. And it was heart breaking when I woke up. It's those kind of damn nice dreams whereby you wish your body had complied and remained in its state of rest. It's those kind whereby you wake up and your heart is still pumping really fast; that adrenaline rush. It's those kind whereby you go, "Damn! I really hope it's gonna happen in reality."

I dreamt of all kinds of stuff; upcoming results, my house being attacked by weird people, having fun with this special someone. No, it isn't that kind of special someone, prat. But still, the dream was so real! Argh, why can't reality mimic the dreams we have. Why?! Maybe, maybe certain dreams show your deepest desire. Maybe it's trying to point me to a new path. I've always talked about reinventing yourself in order to be better everytime. Maybe, just maybe, it's time for me to shift my priorities a little and have a tad bit of fun.

Well, I gotta go now. Training soon and I bet I'll regret not keeping "marathon fit" cause it's fitness today. Now I gotta wake up my mind and stop being a baby. Actually wait, I wanna be a baby. Then I get to sleep more and dream more beautiful stuff. Then again, I don't just wanna dream all my life do I? Okay, I'll actualise it. Hey you special someone, HERE I COME!

2007-12-09T01:33:00.000+08:00

I'm waking up at the start of the end of the world, but it's feeling just like every other morning before, Now I wonder what my life is going to mean if it's gone. - Matchbox Twenty

2007-12-07T21:42:00.000+08:00

I was just guessing.
The numbers and figures.
Pulling your puzzles apart. - Coldplay

2007-12-06T20:07:00.000+08:00

What I am,
It's not all good.
It's not all bad,
It's okay. - West Grand Boulevard

2007-12-05T22:26:00.000+08:00

I won't stand in your way
let your hatred grow
and she'll scream,
and she'll shout,
and she'll pray,
and she had a name.
Yeah; she had a name. - Muse

2007-12-04T20:16:00.000+08:00

We're never gonna win the world,
we're never gonna stop the war.
We're never gonna beat this
if belief is what we're fighting for. - John Mayer

Observing sick elderly patients made me reflect a hell lot. It's unnerving at times to think of the sufferings you're going to have to encounter in life; all that disappointment and anxiety. Sometimes, even the most optimistic of optimistic people want their lone time. I think it's my turn to cower in a shell for now and be oblivious to everything around me as I try and fix the broken within me. Just have a little faith in me people; all will be well soon.

2007-11-22T15:01:00.001+08:00

Hello everyone, beautiful day today. Sun is really up and about making me sweat even in the comforts of my room. Before you proceed any further, I would just like to state that today's post is dedicated to the PSLE students who just received their results approximately 3 hours ago? Thereabout.

Well well, I remember the day I received my PSLE results, for sure. But only up to the point whereby my form teacher gave me that smirk when she handed me my results. From then on, everything for the next few days were a blur. I cried and cried and cried and never did get over it for the whole month, actually it still hurts till today. After some time, it's like I started dreading about what was to come about in life. I didn't want to proceed any further. I mean oh god, I was freaking going to St.Gabriel's man. Oh my gosh. St.Gabriel's! The most screwed up school in the whole freaking Singapore. Didn't help that my brother kept telling me about the hostile environment in that school. Hahaha, thinking back, it was quite funny that I was actually damn biased towards St.Gabriel's in such a negative way. Cause now, I'm pro-Gabrielite. Lets just say that whatever happened between then and now, were the best things that could possibly ever happen to me. THE BEST DAMN THING! (Yay! Avril Lavigne! You rock!)

Wait, I haven't made my point yet. To the moral of the story a.k.a CODA! You see as humans, we are bound to face major disappointments in life. Sometimes in order to solve a question, we need to ask even more questions of ourselves. But how do we know we are asking the correct questions? Just as I was in the gym just now in school with Aaron, we saw a couple of parents (apparent that they were inquiring about St.Gabriel's) touring and checking out the facilities. Why does it seem so important to them? Why are they setting a bad example for their kids? Why are they inquiring about what the school has to offer for their kids? As parents, shouldn't they rather be asking themselves what their kids can do for the school? It's really sad. Sigh, sometimes our actions are well-intended but we don't seem to be able to connect the dots until we look back further on in time.

To those who have excelled in your Primary School Leaving Examinations, congratulations to you. Be optimistic about your future for there are many great things to look forward to. However, be cautiously optimistic because the closer you think you are to heaven, the bigger your ego gets and then poof, you lose everything. For those who didn't do too well, it's alright. Now is the best time to reflect on what you want to do with your life. But please please please don't be dejected, ever. It's alright to be sad for a moment, but you have to move on. Time doesn't actually heal all wounds, but it can help you come to terms with your shortcomings and make you an even stronger person. Make full use of this disappointment to drive you even further in life.

Soon, you'll be entering the most exciting period of your life, teenage-hood. For most of the time, your emotions will decide what you do. But you have to learn to cope with your impulses. Nothing is overnight, no success is born in an instant. Every story needs to be crafted from scratch. My advice? Stand up for what you believe in yet also be humble at the same time. There may be times whereby you feel as if life is spiralling out of control and you want no further part of it. Yet, trust me on this. There's more that meets the eye they say, I totally agree. You have to understand that relationships at this point of your life are unnecessary and may actually be a burden to you. Do not follow the people around you blindly, they're just a fashion. They fade in, then they fade out. They promise you the world, yet deliver you to hell. So begone now, enjoy the fruits of life and also the bitterness of medicine. Only when you understand your role in society will you then be able to make rational decisions. For now, stick close to your parents and follow every good example they set. Be patient with your tribulations, soon enough, secondary school life will be over.

2007-11-20T22:57:00.000+08:00

You know, you can do all sorts of things to spice up a marriage. But what do you do to add flavour to a friendship that's fading?

2007-11-17T00:27:00.000+08:00

"I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." - Pledge of Allegiance

Just look at that and look at what has become of the great superpower, United States of America. Under God you say, I didn't know gay rights and abortion were approved by the Church you stand so fervently behind. And neither did I know that invading other countries against the will of the United Nations was for liberty and justice for all. Oh yea, your people are considered "all." Talk about freedom of speech and human rights? Shut the hell up you bunch of mofos. Your country is governed by a group of filthy rich people who couldn't care-less about what goes on around them. Why don't the Congress, send their kids to the war eh?!

Mother fuckers. Like literally. Stop polluting the world with your egocentric views. You discredit the one single respectable politician that comes about (Barack Obama) and you champion the scum (Hilary Clinton). Ass-wipe. Hello censorship board. Don't censor me now.

2007-11-15T22:47:00.000+08:00

All I want for Christmas is a Rubik's Cube. Thanks Santa.

2007-11-15T01:24:00.000+08:00

"She wants to know am I still a slut." - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Hello! I'm back, for real! The inertia of my life has propelled me into the next stage of evolution. Anyway, diving straight in, I've come to realise that most blogs are popular because they are either;

1. Those of celebrities
2. Those who are damn pretty or hot or beautiful or gorgeous or try to be (Celeste Chen, Tila Tequila - google them and you'll know why)
3. Controversial ones

With the resurrection of my blog, woah, I've decided to be a tad bit more mature with my posts. Ok not like adult-adult mature, cause being matured is like taking the fun out of blogging. But of course, I'll try to avoid childish rants, outburts, whatever. I swear I won't mention anything about my life though, unless;

1. It's damn important
2. It's a significant event
3. I feel like it, awesome.

Alright. I'm gonna sleep now. Will be back to save the world.

2007-08-12T07:10:00.001+08:00

It's 7.20am on a Sunday morning and I'm checking out of here. I've got my books (baggage), passport (O'level entry proof), and I'm all set to NOT come back here for the next THREE months. You can say it's an extended study leave. I'm hoping that I won't get on this computer other than to download school work and check test results (and maybe sneak in a couple more times to find out the results of soccer games cause I don't wanna watch them anymore, too late at night).

*Inhales* Goodbye!

You’ll look upon your life and see familiar grounds
You’ll hear the call of memories and recognize the sound
All the lives you change will make stars disappear
And as you’re settled down,
you’ll realize you’ve never left here.

2007-08-05T00:50:00.000+08:00

"It's good to know what the enemy is talking about." - Hermione Granger (well, I think that's what she said)

Time Check:
2 more days to second last Physics Class Test.
4 more days to National Day.
10 more days to school's band concert at VCH.
12 more days to last Chemistry Class test.
15 more days to O'level English Oral Examination.
17 more days to the start of Prelim Examinations.
26 more days to September Holidays.
27 more days to Teachers' Day.
74 more days to O'level Science Practical.

2007-08-03T16:54:00.000+08:00

Thanks J.K Rowling, thanks for the Harry Potter series. Thanks for the wonderful characters in them, thanks for Harry Potter and Hermonie Granger and Ron Weasley and all. My life couldn't move on without reading the last book and I isolated (well, almost) myself to indulge in the wonderful book, stopping only to re-read parts whereby I fail to comprehend. The emptiness, it sucks. There will never be a series as great as this, how every single action has a 'logical' reasoning to it and how everything falls into place; it will never be replicated.

Just reading about a certain 'person' being so courageous even in the darkest hour and still be able to hear his own voice, albeit with some help from compatriots, has taught me a million gazillion things I'd never thought could be derived from a single action. Like what Marianne Williamson says, "And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." The power of bravery and how it can affect all those around us.

I remember when I was in Primary 3 and my brother was just starting out in secondary school. He'd come back from school and set about doing his E Math homework on Algebra. And I sat at the opposite end of the table thinking that someday I'm gonna be famous for writing my own laws on Algebra. Didn't really work out did it? Well, in a way, I did somewhat wrote my own Algebraic laws. That's how I ended up failing E Math horrendously in lower secondary. Yea, we all have our lofty standards that we wish to achieve right from the moment we cried our way into the world. At this age though, our goals are never staring at us at the end of the tunnel.

I miss those days in my mummy's tummy. In total solitude, I could think of everything and anything I wanted, and when I got excited, I'd just 'kick' my mummy to tell her of my plans to make her proud when I got out into the world. Oh those days, away from sins and all this "strangers." But I'll never give up hope, on finding my purpose, which seems to keep refocusing to a different area of my life every other day. Bet on it that whatever quest I undertake, it'll be for the Greater Good of mankind. All is, and will always be, well.

2007-07-29T23:36:00.000+08:00

Hey people. How's life, really. Hope everyone is getting along fine. I've been doing pretty alright myself. Starting to settle down in this hectic schedule, getting around to studying more and more. And it's getting addictive, studying I mean. There is this satisfaction I get when I complete my homework, or when I answer a question I'm very familiar with, or research on facts for my essays. The feeling is...indescribable.

I hate those last minute struggles with my conscience before each test. It's like, "Hah, you're gonna fail this test big time bro! Serve you right for not revising thoroughly." And this mental battle keeps replaying through my mind during a test that it becomes a burden. I think I really need to learn how to shut out such negative thoughts from my mind. Concentration and confidence is key to unlocking any trap doors, to go beyond the boundaries of human capability and use more than 10% of my brain (that's the limit for most homos').

As I read through this post again, checking for spelling errors, I've realised that a lot of "I" have been used. Never mind. Graduation video coming along fine, we kind of just finished recording the one song we want to play on the video. Sounds pretty alright, oh I miss jamming sessions! It might seem like a waste of time and money, but I get this out of world sensation when I'm in the studio with my friends. Ah, one of those things I'll miss when I look back at my high school days and relieve them through "yellowing" pictures. A touch of sentimental-ism.

Aight people, I better get going now. It's almost 12am and I better get some sleep. There's like triple English tomorrow after recess. Gosh, time seems to be taking an elevator everytime I'm here. Good day and good night.

2007-07-24T21:58:00.001+08:00

We've taken it to a whole new level,
beyond the measure of human value.

To this elusive place the mind ventures,
where the world is but a place of hope.

And we see nothing in a round-about fashion;
For we feel safe by the absence of our enemies.

Our words replay in their mind,
like a broken record that irks the heart.

The taxing life of being a teenager,
that I'll never forget - forever and ever and ever.

2007-07-23T22:51:00.000+08:00

My battles are fought due to insecurity.

The anger that's taking over me,
is an armour over my fears and weaknesses.

It protects me from dear melancholy,
yet shields me from myself.

Forgiving is never about the other person,
it always begins with me, me, me.

2007-07-19T22:30:00.001+08:00

"Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe." - Note to self.

Minister of State coming tomorrow! Hahaha. Eh, why did I laugh again? Oh never mind you. WE gotta constantly reinvent ourselves for the greater good of Mankind my friend. Yes, for we are the upcoming generation. And we will rule one day! Roaaaaaar! Exams, exams, exams. You are the beginning of life yet you arrive like death. Sigh. Another note to self - STUDY!

Hello, we shouldn't copy ideas wholesale you know. I think someone who is 75% un-original/think that they are original, needs a brain-fix. Why 75%? Cause most of our lives are spent with people (hopefully), and we tend to be influenced by them. Fashion, language, habit etc. And people who can't admit this fall into the second category; those that think they are original. Total prats.

I like it when people tell me to grow up. MOST of the time I'll take this remark personally and think of a way to effect a change in myself. Without such reminders in life, I think I'll be an asshole for life. Think about those emo kids, no one there to remind them to grow up. And they're emo for a long period of time. How sad, to wake up to a new dawn, and yet not place any significance to it at all. To appreciate life is to live it. So I shall shut up and embrace it now. Goodbye fellow friends.

2007-07-08T20:53:00.000+08:00

"If we protect the world, the world will protect us." - Live Earth

HELLO! After spending almost 12 hours in front of the television set watching Live Earth, I've come to realise that the time spent supposedly to support raising the awareness of Global Warming could have been used to revise for my upcoming tests. And I'll explain why.

First, some of the bands/performances that played Live Earth were really horrendous. Rize? WTF!! The damn vocalist pointed his damn MIDDLE FINGER on GLOBAL TELEVISION. How the hell is raising awareness about global warming got to do with lousy metal bands and their half naked vocalists pointing middle finger. What an embarrassment to Tokyo, especially to the organisers for that matter. Must have lost their minds when they decided to invite such a band to an environmental-awareness concert.

Second, major artists like Pussycat Dolls, Linkin' Park do not seem to have understood the meaning of such events. I really do not want to continue critisizing because they have supported the cause and that is what counts. Their appearance on the programme is already a big boost to the Live Earth organisation. Let's not hope, but act in unity to save Earth. I really believe that Global Warming is the cause of all this havoc in the world.

There were a lot of interesting cross-genre music during the concert. The Police playing with a rapper? Wow, that's a first. You know, I've been thinking a lot about my musical influences. I love listening to the radio, they've got all kinds of genre. And yea, I think "Umbrella" is sexy, but only when it is fused with the electronic sound in it. When played live without them, it sounds hollow. And well, I've decided to just listen to any music that's good. Really. Listening to a certain type of genre limits your musical exposure and you only stand to lose from it. I say, for every occassion, there is always a music to fit it.

All it takes is one rock n' roll show to change the world, but it also takes one hell of a guy brave enough to rap about his life in a 3 minutes song. Have fun, stay green.

We are the Children of the Revolution.

2007-06-24T17:55:00.000+08:00

"It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated." - Alec Bourne

I've been reading a book for the past two days that has really captivated me, it's called "Blood Memory." And it's about this lady who was sexually abused when she was young by her grandfather, and seems to have no memories or recollection of the event or her childhood for that matter until recent events trigger panic attacks which brings about her curiosity.

She travels on this meandering path to find out what's hidden in her sub-conscious mind and digs deeper into this particular theory in psychology, repressed memory, whereby a person is able to detach their mind from the situation thus not being able to remember the incident. It's really exciting, definetely worth the read.

Repressed memory? Is it possible? A repressed memory, according to some theories of psychology, is a memory (often traumatic) of an event or environment which is stored by the unconscious mind but outside the awareness of the conscious mind. I've really been asking myself, do I have any repressed memories? And I just pondered on this question for hours on my bed, trying to think of as many significant moments when I was in kindergarten.

But...nothing much really came up. And it sort of frightened me, yea, frightened me. That's right. Another part of my life I have to sort out. But what the heck, solving a problem just creates two more. I think I'll leave my soul searching to later. Sanity is not something I want at the moment, not when I'll be mugging for hours on end for O'levels.

Yours faithfully, with the absence of humanity.

2007-06-22T20:59:00.000+08:00

"You'll never achieve 100% if 99% is OK." - Will Smith

And so it is, I'm back. My plan to go on a social hiatus went awry as I just couldn't resist the temptation to be back here again, sharing views about the WORLD. Yea, I like those big, major, super huge topics. If someone were to ask me to write a 300-word essay on LIFE, I'll go why not! I like dealing with things much larger than I actually am.

I've got really big dreams I guess. I aspire to be the Prime Minister of Singapore someday. Politics is something that is very closely linked to our lives, if you bother to pay close attention to it. I know it is just not everyday that you come across a teenager who is interested in the world politics, but hey, Thank God It's Today!

One thing I've gotten sick of is vulgarities, another is Singlish. I don't know why I typed Singlish with a capital S, it's not even a recognised language. Ouch. Anyway, yea, I'm really trying to eradicate vulgarities from my vocabulary. It's just so "low-class" and uncivilised to use curse words in your sentences.

English is not something that naturally came to me, I really had to widen my horizons and explore this language. Up to date, I still don't think I've really got a good grasp of the language. But it still beats my Malay, hands down. Heh, and MT Oral is like next week?! I hope that when I do something lame in that examination room, the examiners will enjoy it and give me an even HIGHER GRADE!

Well well, I better get going. Oh, and if you have a post on your blog that goes like, "I know, I know, you guys think I'm lame", it really shows you created a blog to be an ASS. Do yourself a favour, CLOSE IT DOWN. This is not a personal attack of any sorts though.

Disclaimer: If you really do close it down, it's not my fault. It was YOUR choice.

2007-06-12T23:02:00.001+08:00

I'm leaving. Goodbye.

2007-06-08T07:17:00.000+08:00

H-A-T-E. It is pushing me away from everyone.

2007-05-31T16:25:00.000+08:00

If people could just shut up about how lousy their lives are, maybe they would realise how many people in Africa are dying every day due to problems related to poverty and support this fight.

http://www.one.org/

OR

http://www.onesingapore.org/

God is in the slums, in the cardboard boxes where the poor play house. God is in the silence of a mother who has infected her child with a virus that will end both their lives. God is in the cries heard under the rubble of war. God is in the debris of wasted opportunity and lives, and God is with us if we are with them.

2007-05-30T21:15:00.000+08:00

If movies were as good as their previews, people wouldn't be watching porn.

2007-05-28T13:57:00.000+08:00

I knew I would feel this lousy after the paper. I knew it, I just knew it. Careless mistakes here and there, arghh. Really God, why do bad things happen to good people?

2007-05-27T15:37:00.000+08:00

I need to get some things off my chest. I don't feel good, not good at all. Is this how everyone is feeling at the moment? I'm feeling really scared, not because I didn't prepare or study or anything like that. I'm scared I can't match up with those brain-iacs at TKGS or SJI or Victoria. This fear is making me forget simple words. Arghh, what if I panic during the paper tomorrow? What if I don't understand most of the questions? How will I react? SA1 seems so damn easy compared to this, the stress, the anxiety, the wait!

O'levelsO'levelsO'levelsO'levelsO'levelsO'levelsO'levels

2007-05-16T18:44:00.001+08:00

Hello everyone. I think it's nice to start a post by greeting people, I think. So, what have I been up to lately? Nothing. Just going through that process of studying really hard last minute and then wanting to rip my hair off after each test realising that last minute cramming only helps to a certain extent. Oh, correction, that means I have been up to something. Jeeez. Ok moving on to the BIG idea for this post (every writer/blogger wants to have that oh-my-god-the-world-must-know-what-I'm-thinking-about idea).

Arts. Yes, arts. There are so many people out there who label themselves as "art-sy" people just because they took art-related subjects at tertiary or pre-tertiary level. I find this really stupid. What is arts? Mainstream media reckons that arts is just about being weird and different. Wow, they made nuclear physics sound as easy as A-B-C. If being an art-sy person was so easy, every single school-dropout will be saying that they were just daring to be different and that mainstream education pollutes the mind (which is true to a certain extent, but you can't say certain because it shows that you're sitting on the fence and that you're not willing to commit to the idea). The fact that you claim to be an arts student is alright, it shows that you're learning the real meaning of the word. But that you claim to be the very word itself, is just pure nonsense. No one is the exact meaning of a certain word. Saying something like, "He's a real gentleman" doesn't mean that-that person is one. That is YOUR definition, YOUR view, of the word which has already been influenced by the media, society and that thing called the DICTIONARY. Perfection is not something you can flirt with, but then again, it's good to strive for perfection. I hate the dictionary by the way. It's a propaganda book. It limits your mind to think a certain way.

Guess what, that was an extract from the book I'm currently writing which I hope to publish on my own. Do stay tune to my blog for an update on my book which I hope to release early 2008. Thank you for your patience in reading through this post, public is always right; well, that's what the media tells me.

2007-05-12T21:30:00.000+08:00

"WISDOM BEGINS IN WONDER" - Socrates

2007-04-30T20:29:00.000+08:00

I've got cool friends, really. As in people who I can alliance myself with and whom I trust. I've got a friend who helps me with my daily school work and constantly gives me study tips. There's another who can make you laugh for hours without end. Another can reach deep into your soul when talking to you. Tell me, were you expecting me to list down things that they do and the talents that they possess? It's all superficial readers, it's all superficial. I think that's the damn reason why most of us feel that we are betrayed by people whom we think we could place our trust in; there was nothing to begin with!

2007-04-24T16:41:00.000+08:00

You know, sometimes I just don't understand people. Today was especially frustrating; one of those days whereby you feel like commiting a massacre. Why? Because there is this idiotic fellow who recorded everything I said during Social Studies lesson yesterday about gays that are in society nowdays. He then proceeded to reveal these contents to a downright homosexual in class (who was absent during that lesson). Well, you can basically guess what happened next. But no, I'm not angry about getting called a "bitch" for it; really. I got what I deserve, a backstabbing bastard. I'm just really pissed off at those who laughed behind this guy's back and then informed him about what I said without a single guilt. The backstabber getting backstabbed, what irony.

I thought this class was really made of something, built on trust and friendship. I guess I was wrong. There are those who just can't keep a fucking conversation within the walls of the classroom. For that matter, YES, I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUALITY! God did not create men and women for the sake of it. Most religions preach against such acts of blasphemy yet the number of homosexuals (& lesbians for that matter) are rising in the world. WHY?! Blame it on the generosity of people on gays in America who suffered AIDS during the early 1980s. Yes, it is really unfortunate and tragic for many people to die from AIDS every year. But this kind of thing wouldn't have even happened if Men had obeyed and listened to God all along. No one is born a homosexual; homosexuality is a preference. It is sex that destroys people, but it also creates life.

I'm thinking of starting an 'Anti-Gay Movement' after O'Levels, seriously. The more our generation is exposed to pornographic materials, the harder it would be to control those lustful thoughts. What would become of us when our generation rule the world? Gay and lesbian marriages a norm? I'll most probably get assasinated in my sleep for speaking my mind on this matter. Ah well, at least I'll die trying to make this world a better place. I'll write to the Straits Times Forum section to see what other Singaporeans make of this. God created Adam & Eve, not Adam & Steve. Sorry homosexuals, it's nothing personal, I just don't share your views.

2007-04-07T23:08:00.000+08:00

I need a break, I need to piece myself back together.

2007-03-31T23:48:00.000+08:00

i'm feeling right, tonight

2007-03-31T22:32:00.000+08:00

Haha, I'm back! You see, everytime someone comes back from "blog-exile", they change their blog skin and make a dramatic entry. Ah, weird isn't it? It's like noticing someone has a stain on their shirt/blouse, and you instantaneously check your own in case you too suffer the fate upon which you will start laughing at that person.

Oh, I almost forgot to elaborate on the picture above considering the thought just before this shot through me like an electrical shock causing me to have this urge to type it out. Well, as you can see, everyone is sporting the now famous "i'm-cool-cause-i-don't-have-any-hair" expression. Ok, so we all (as in the entire soccer team) shaved. Am I a trend-follower? Maybe. No, let me change that. It would be most likely, I generally want to be doing the "in-thing" at the moment. Sad thing though, some of my teacher think I'm an attention-seeker, not because of the haircut, but because I keep rubbing my head in class and proclaiming that I feel like Britney Spears or a spanking-sexy monk every period. Woah, that sounds kinda irritating.

Anyway, I'm starting to enjoy soccer all over! Yipee!! And that's because I'm not putting too much pressure on myself to perform (Nationals next week!). The same thing is going on in my studies, my results though not fantastic, is "on-its-way" to achieving my goal (except for Malay, grrrr). You know, I think I have a problem. I'm really nice to people I just know but get really evil as the friendship prolongs. I also have this very weird feeling when I'm facing up to certain people. I label them under "awkward people" cause I can't seem to talk properly or just shift my focus ever so often which implies that I'm not very comfortable in their presence. Funny, cause I'm a pretty confident person.

Well that's it for today people, awww. I hate people who attract the sympathy of others on purpose. You know like those "don't miss me" kind of phrases, trying to act all emo. And I'm kinda scared of using the slang "emo" cause it has this social stigma around it. Teenagers go through this stage of transformation whereby they listen to pop when they first enter secondary school, then as they start encountering troubles, they listen to emo/screamo/hardcore whatever crap, but then they get bored of feeling depressed, so they listen to indie rock. However, they get sick of rocking and they turn to classical/jazz/blues. Weird? Maybe. I'm procrastinating again! DAMN! Bye now.

the class we love;

2007-03-03T08:52:00.000+08:00

hello!

2007-02-20T07:25:00.000+08:00

Ok, time for a post. If you're gonna take a toilet break now, I suggest you stay put. I'm bringing all my readers through an emotional roller-coaster never before experienced on this blog. (Really?!) Naaah, just kidding. Take a fast one kiddo.

It's really been a bit quiet on my side of the road. What's so interesting about studying and playing soccer almost everyday? The story just doesn't seem to update itself. I've ran around in circles in my head. Doing stupid things just doesn't entertain me as much nowadays, I mean I still do suffer from those occassional craziness but it's pretty much simmered down eh?

Anyway, as most of you would have already known, we did the dance during the CNY performance. It wasn't too bad but we are definetely appreciative of the support shown! Show some love and I'll holla back when I've got substance. I've suddenly developed a mental block after knowing that I'd failed a test. Not good boys and girls, not good, peace.

where are your dance shoes?

2007-02-17T09:20:00.000+08:00

game of life;

2007-02-07T06:09:00.000+08:00

What is friendship with boundaries?
What is love with conditions?

my obsession;

2007-01-30T21:49:00.000+08:00

Hello! Did I tell you I have a lump on my right nipple? I thought I had breast cancer for god's sake!! Hahaha! Ok-ok, enough. It's just a stage in puberty but I wonder why mine hardened a little later compared to the majority, hmmm.

Anyway, the graduating batch is having "Mission Day" this Thursday and Friday. Great, no lessons for two whole solid days! Can you imagine the joy of total liberation from lessons? Nah, nothing as dramatic as that. The programme's purpose is to help us to eradicate all those unnecessary problems in our lives, set goals and stuff like that. Pretty much boring though, gotta immerse myself in the situation. Dying to breath that fresh air when the adrenaline pumps through my veins.

Oh, today was pretty crappy by the way. All Sec 4 SLC's do NOT need to do duty anymore except for those in the sub-exco and exco. Damn (oh no, I said it), that means I have to continue with duty for the next 3 months? Seriously, can't wait for investiture to pass on to the next bunch of leaders.

Soccer tomorrow, nothing much to look forward too except to more scolding and shouting at by my coach. Gone are the days when soccer was a passion, it's a nightmare nowadays (that's why I'm feeling pretty-crappy lately). We're having the first match of the season tomorrow and we don't even know who is in the squad. He has not announced the 20 players yet, gosh.

Well ok I shall go now! Triple mother tongue period tomorrow, killer killer. God bless.

and now we mourn;

2007-01-29T20:03:00.000+08:00

So the good boys and girls take the so called right track
Faded white hats
Grabbing credits
Maybe transfers
They read all the books but they can't find the answers
And all of our parents
They're getting older
I wonder if they've wished for anything better
While in their memories
Tiny tragedies